I've been thinking of writing an autobiography or memoir, but it just never comes together for me, but I figured if I write one story at a time and post it on my blog maybe once a month, I can do that. Maybe one day I'll pull all the stories together and put them in a book but for now I'll just share some stories with you about my childhood and into adulthood. Some of the stories will be happy, some sad and some horrific because that was my childhood. But they will all be real, things that actually happened. If it seems like something that people enjoy reading maybe, I'll keep it going. These stories will not be in any kind of order; I'll just write them as they come to me.
Mamaw
Mamaw is what I called my grandmother (mom's mother).
My Grandma had an interesting life so I thought I would share a little bit about it. When my grandma was 13, she got married for the first time to a much older man who was a boxer. Within a year she had my uncle Jack, I don't know what happened to her husband because she wouldn't talk about it, all I know is that he was not in her life after my uncle was born.
My grandma was born in Ohio, and she had a sister named Mary. Funny enough Mary met 2 brothers and ended up having a son with each of the brothers. So, the brothers were half-brothers as well as cousins. My cousins. I grew up knowing the brothers, Ron and Bobby. Bobby grew up to be a Sherriff in Ohio, but then he had a mental break down one day and was standing in the road shooting his gun at nothing. He got help but had to retire from the Sheriff's office.
My grandma's parents made her give her son, my uncle Jack to some other cousins and they raised him his whole life. He knew who his mother was though and came for visits, and the cousins sent my grandma pictures of him as he was growing up. My grandma ended up working for Lockheed, on an assembly line making and putting together plane parts for the company.
Uncle Jack went into the army when he turned 18 during the Vietnam war and Mamaw had a relationship with him after he got out of the army. My grandma met my grandfather while she was working at Lockheed. They got married and had my mom, they also had a little boy who died right after he was born. But my grandparent's marriage didn't last long and they split up.
They got back together when my mom was 17. My grandma told my grandfather that my mother had been raped by my grandmother's boyfriend at the time. My grandparents took my mom and moved across the country where my mom had her son, who I later found when he was in his thirties after my mom had given him up for adoption at her parent's request.
A couple of years after my half-brother was born my grandparents split up again and my grandma ended up with a man named Paul, they did not get married but they were together long enough to have a common law marriage in California. In 1979 My grandmother had an aneurysm and almost died. But she had brain surgery, they fixed the aneurysm and over the course of a year she learned to walk, talk, feed herself etc but she was partially blind and one eye. In 1980 she left Paul.
Within a couple of years she also fought breast cancer and got through that. And in 1983 my grandparents decided to get back together. They had never divorced legally so they were still married. But then my grandfather found out he had lung cancer that had spread everywhere and within a year he had passed away.
This is a couple of pictures from when my grandma married Buster.
Within 2 years my grandmother found someone else and she got married to Buster and soon thereafter she found out that she needed a heart valve replacement and had open heart surgery. She had valve installed to replace her faulty valve and things were going well until her new husband, Buster started drinking heavily and forgot to give her the medications she needed which caused her to have a stroke. I don't know what the medication was, this is just what all the adults had been saying at the time.
After being in a coma for a couple of weeks she woke up but there was brain damage she did not remember most of her life, did not realize she was married to the man she was married to now. The brain damage never got any better. I was 15 years old at the time and we were living in California.
Buster sold most of their belongings, packed up a U-Haul truck and drove back to West Virginia where he had a house. A couple of years later, my mom, and my brother and I lived with them for about a year. When they first moved into his house, my grandma called 911 a couple of times and told them that her husband was keeping his dead, ex-wife in a trunk upstairs. She had brain damage and after they searched the house he tried explaining that to them, they understood but they weren't happy when they got called out another time for the same reason a few more times over the next couple of years. He stayed with my grandmother and took care of her until she passed away in 1988.
Links to past stories
2023
2024
That is certainly a chaotic family history. You must have a phenomenal memory to keep track of all that. Congratulations on having managed a stable family existence once you were grown up.
ReplyDeleteI remember all of it because my family talked about it all the time and I was a teenager through some of it and was there all the time.
DeleteThe thought of being married at 13, the age of my eldest great-granddaughter, and having a baby a year later amazes me.
ReplyDeleteYour grandmother was a lovely looking young woman, but what a chaotic life she had.
I know, it's crazy. Thank you.
DeleteYour family has had some tragedy in their life without a doubt. It's nice that you actually know the story that it is sad to know that members of the family can get so sick and pass away. I'm praying that your daughter is getting better.
ReplyDeleteI've had so many sick family members and cancer is very prevalent in my family.
DeleteI cannot keep all of that straight, but I do get the overall … well someone said chaos up above, so I go with that because I can’t think of anything better. Overall chaos.
ReplyDeleteI get that. Chaos is a good word for my family.
DeleteShe was good looking but what a life poor lady.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteWhat a hard and tragic life she had.
ReplyDeleteYes she did.
DeleteYou have her eyes! She sure went through a lot of medical issues and men. I'm glad that her last husband took care of her at the end.
ReplyDeleteShe had a lot of medical issues. Both of my grandparents did.
DeleteWow, that’s a lot of trauma.
ReplyDeleteIt is, she went through a lot.
DeleteWhat a shame Mary. She was a lovely woman.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteThe stories of our lives. No one really knows what we go through. Your grandma was a strong woman.
ReplyDeleteThat's so true. That's why I like doing these posts. She really was.
DeleteWhat an amazing and intense family history, Mary. Your grandmother certainly lived through a lot, and you’ve told her story with a lot of grace. I think it’s a fantastic idea to share these monthly—I’ll definitely be tuned in for the next one!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, I really appreciate that.
DeleteWhat a tragic life your grandma had.
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking of writing about my life too but I just keep putting it off. One day, maybe I will write about the fun times and heartbreak but not right now.
I think it's a great idea for people to write about the stories of their lives. No one knows what others have been through.
DeleteYour grandmother had quite a life. And with the back and forth with your grandfather. Her life might make an interesting book as well. Too bad she never wrote her memoirs.
ReplyDeleteit would have interesting to read her point of view.
DeleteYikes. Married at 13, a son at 14, and then she couldn't even raise him. All those health issues, too.
ReplyDeleteThings sure were different when she was younger.
DeleteWhat a tragic, drama-filled life she led.
ReplyDeleteShe had a lot of sorrow in her life for sure.
DeleteWow, what a life she had. If only we could read a book on her story, it would be so interesting.
ReplyDelete