I've been thinking of writing an autobiography or memoir but it just never comes together for me but I figured if I write one story at a time and post it on my blog maybe once a month, I can do that. Maybe one day I'll pull all the stories together and put them in a book but for now I'll just share some stories with you about my childhood. Some of the stories will be happy, some sad and some horrific because that was my childhood. But they will all be real, things that actually happened. If it seems like something that people enjoy reading maybe I'll keep it going. These stories will not be in any kind of order, I'll just write them as they come to me.
My Mom's Boyfriend, Fuzzy
My mom had several boyfriends after she and my dad divorced and when I was 14 her boyfriend's name was Fuzzy, he didn't last very long but he was always at the house. Fuzzy liked to get into my room and take the food that I bought for myself. I was working babysitting and cleaning houses for two ladies on my street. My mom didn't buy a lot of food so I was buying some stuff for myself, not a lot just a few things like a couple of cans of corned beef hash and some beef jerky. Fuzzy would get into my room and go through my things and find my food and eat it.
So I went to a veterinarian's office bought two cans of the high priced wet dog food that looked like it could substitute for corned beef hash because it had the little chunks of potato in it. And I replaced the label from my corned beef hash with the label from the dog food. And then I hid them in the same place in my room. I also bought some dog jerky it was like begging strips or something like that and put it in the bag of my jerky. He found both of those and was eating a bowl of corned hash when I got home from babysitting one night, and he kept making a weird face while he was eating it and I just looked at him and said are you okay. And he said the corned beef hash doesn't taste right. I think it might have gone bad. And I was like oh okay, but he kept eating it. And then he found the other can and he did the same thing a couple of days later and after he was all done with the bowl of corned beef hash, I looked at him and said I hope you liked the dog food.
He didn't pay any attention to me at all. And he ate a couple of strips of the supposed beef jerky and said that it wasn't good that whatever I had gotten he didn't think it was good anymore and that's when I told him that he should stay out of my stuff maybe, go buy your own stuff and he just laughed at me. And of course my mom said nothing she just didn't care.
So I bought another can of the good dog food and hid it in my room and this guy was so dumb that he didn't look at the label he just picked up the can, opened it and started eating it. So I picked the the can up out of the trash and set it on the counter when he was just about done with the bowl of "corned beef hash" and said did you even read this? And he just looked at me and smiled because he thought he was you know, eating my corned beef hash and I started reading what was on the label and it said something to the effect of wet dog food, veterinary recommended.
And he stopped and he jumped up and he grabbed the can off the counter and he started reading it himself and it finally dawned on him what I had done. And he started laughing about it but not the usual belly laugh that he had when he was eating my stuff. It was more of a oh yeah you got me, I'm going to get you back for that one. And he just kept looking at me and giving me dirty looks all day but I stopped buying anything and hiding it in my room.
If I wanted to use my money for a snack or something I would just go to Wendy's that wasn't too far away and buy myself a hamburger and eat it before I got home because I knew nothing in my room was safe from my mom or any of her boyfriend's. They didn't last long after that and I was really glad to see him go.