Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Twitter Wednesday

Here's another installment of Twitter Wednesday where I find humorous Twitterings and post them here for you to see. The @ and names have been left off so no one gets mad. Enjoy!

Chocolate is better than sex and it doesn't leave a bitter taste in my mouth.

Cricket sounds like squeaky fan belt.

I don't find anything wrong with either throbbing, twitching, engorgement, pounding, thrusting, pulsating, etc

The good thing about being a short girl...the illusion that your hair grows fast.

Sigh. Trying to get Mini ready for bed. School reading is due Friday, and his Ninja book is missing. Go ahead, cue the jokes.

Busy Mom Cookbook: Should be called heat and eat. LOL

Nuuuuuuu! Someone (probably me) ate all my mac 'n' cheese I had in the kitchen! ....good thing I hid a secret stash in my room.

In my experience, babies don't really know a lot, so I don't know how much faith I'd put into what they're saying.

The road to success is always under construction.

Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it and then wonder what to do with it once you have it.

behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Men are children that have never grown up.

Any woman can be a super model. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.

people need to get their facts straight first...AND then distort them how they want. sheesh

I'm smiling...this should scare you.

whatever you do...don't look under the bed.

I've had a book of stamps for 2 months and only used two of them. I remember when I would go through several stamps a week.

dressing your animals up for halloween? Don't. Just don't.

Isn't it like a law or something, that when you pick up a cookie and another one is attached it still counts as one cookie.

Am I the only one scared to look up old classmates from school. What if they are jerks now?

Pumpkin chocolate chip cinnamon cookies. Might as well be crack! That's how addicted to them I am.

I have a relationship with a hairy, fat, slob who likes to drink out of the toilet. Poor puppy. lol